How Gotcha4Life Is Building Mental Fitness in Schools

TRANSCRIPT: How Gotcha4Life Is Building Mental Fitness in Schools

The Michelle Pascoe Hospitality Podcast

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Michelle Pascoe: Good morning everyone, and thank you so much for joining us today. Now, I've had this gentleman on my podcast before, and I've been so looking forward to this conversation, because it's really about the bare bones of what we can do with clubs, and then how it grows into communities, and helps not just the individuals but the broader community and their families. Don Tilley is the expert to talk about this.

Don's diverse career has spanned senior management roles across FMCG, gaming and casinos, and owning and operating a supermarket and bottle shop for three years and four holdups, my goodness, no wonder you finally sold that. And finally, 13 years ago, moving into the charity world with Learning Links, and now with Gotcha4Life. In so many of those roles he worked closely with clubs, but it was only when he started at Learning Links that he realised how much clubs actually do in the community.

Welcome back to the podcast, it's so lovely to have you here again. I know last time you shared so much wonderful information about Learning Links and the good work they do with school children. Now let's talk about Gotcha4Life. But first, I want to hear a little more about you, because I know my listeners do too, we've had so many more join since your last interview. You spent 12 years at Learning Links before making the move to Gotcha4Life. What happened in those 12 years that made you say yes to a new chapter?

Don Tilley: There was nothing sinister. I had 12 wonderful years at Learning Links, a wonderful charity, and we were able to build it up fairly dramatically over that time with a whole host of terrific people in the organisation. But I think the last year I was there we had a record year, and I thought, what a good time to let someone else come in and take on the next chapter. I just woke up one day and thought, I need to do something else.

It's quite interesting, because when I left, I think one third of the people thought I was retiring. I wasn't. The second third thought I had another role. I didn't. And the other third didn't care, and I don't blame them.

When I left I had no role to go to. I knew roughly what I wanted to do, and that was to stay in the club industry and work with clubs, but I didn't know where. I'd spoken to Gotcha4Life back in November, at a presentation they did at Mounties, and Gus got up and spoke, and I thought, they're working with kids in schools, Learning Links do the same, maybe there's some synergies. So I asked if we could catch up, which we did, and there wasn't really anything we could work on together at that point. But they spoke about club grants and said they'd sort of touched their toe in the water but hadn't done a lot. I said if there's anything I can do to help, just let me know, and I'm happy to provide some experience to Josie, who runs the program.

I got a call in January from the CEO to say they wanted to talk more about club grants, and to my surprise they said they wanted me to come and work with them. I thought, what a fabulous charity, what an amazing opportunity, and I jumped at the chance. I started as a fundraising consultant in March, then in August I joined the organisation in a three day a week role, which has gone to a lot more than that during the club grants period. That's how it all started, and I've been there since. I just love what we do.

Michelle Pascoe: Thank you for that backstory, because I know how hard you worked at Learning Links, and if I remember correctly, you went in there for a short term role that turned into 12 years.

Don Tilley: It was a short term role which I forgot to leave until 12 years later. It was terrific. I'm so fortunate to have gone from one great charity to another. Very lucky.

Michelle Pascoe: You're right. Gotcha4Life, I've seen Gus speak at a number of conferences here in Australia, and he is so passionate about the cause. Over the last couple of years it's been that ripple getting stronger and stronger, and now having you on board, really getting in there and explaining to clubs what it is and how club grants can help even more children.

You've worked alongside clubs for a long time, and like myself, over 30 years, I think the registered club industry is a beautiful industry, not just for the people who work there but the broader community that comes through the doors. In that time you worked in FMCG, gaming and casinos, but you've said it wasn't until Learning Links that you truly understood what clubs actually do for the community. I think that happens a lot, even with our own members and guests. They see the club as being there for themselves, it's the meal, having a drink, entertainment, catching up with friends, but they don't always understand what's behind that, what the club is actually there for.

When we look at regional areas we see clubs step up during fires and floods, but it's when our eyes are properly open that we see the full scale of what clubs do for the community. What did you see that really changed your perspective?

Don Tilley: I'd been at Learning Links about a month when I went to a Club Central club grants ceremony, where they used to hand out cheques, they direct debit it now, but I was there and was staggered to hear they'd given away just under one million dollars in grants. I had no idea. I sat there and asked somebody, is this serious, is it that much? And they said absolutely. And that's just one club.

I was driving home that night and my brother-in-law, who runs a hi-fi business, rang me and asked what I was up to. I told him, and he said, clubs give that much money? One club gives that much money? I said, you know they're not-for-profit, don't you? He said, no, I had no idea. And he wasn't the only one. So many people I've spoken to have no idea what clubs do.

I worked with clubs for five years at IGT, working with clubs and casinos, that was the whole role, and I still didn't know the scale of it. Over the time I was at Learning Links I really got to see what clubs do and how committed they are to community, and again, people don't know that. When I had opportunities to talk to patrons during my time at Learning Links, when you tell them what their club is doing, they'd stand up and give you a round of applause. One of the things clubs needed to do, and I think they're doing it better now, is to let their own community know what they do.

I spent a lot of time in my last year at Learning Links talking to politicians and doing videos on club grants, because there was a real risk the club grants system could be changed dramatically. I was passionate about it, because charities like Learning Links would survive if the structure changed, but that mum and dad charity with two volunteers in a Western Sydney school would disappear off the face of the earth. There have been some changes since, but no major ones, which is good. Clubs have got much better over the years at talking about themselves, and the associations do a great job of that too, but it needs to continue, because there are still so many people I talk to who have no idea what clubs do. It's a real shame.

Michelle Pascoe: We've talked about that for a long time within the industry, that we've got to tell people what we do. In the last few years I've seen a massive mindset shift in clubs, actually employing someone who works directly with the community. One guest who springs to mind is Jenny Holt from Club Rivers, who said it was even hard to get an interview into some places to say, we're happy to give you money, because they didn't understand why a club would want to do that.

Don Tilley: You touched on it too, whenever there's a calamity in the community the clubs are first to put their hand up, in regional areas and in Sydney metropolitan areas, with floods in Richmond and Windsor, or what's happened on the northern beaches. Clubs get behind it and support it, and they're the place everybody goes to when there's a real problem. They just need to be congratulated. They're for everybody in the community, no matter how young, how old, or where you're from, you can go to a club and feel that you belong.

Michelle Pascoe: Let's talk more about Gotcha4Life, because people may not have heard about this program. Can you give us an outline of what the project is actually doing on the ground, and what success looks like, not just for the charity but for the communities it touches?

Don Tilley: The program we're working on with clubs is the Mentally Fit Primary School program. Before I get into that, a bit of background on how the charity started. Gus was overseas about nine years ago when he got a phone call to say one of his best mates had taken his own life. He came home for the funeral and asked people, did you know? Nobody knew, which is so common and so sad. He said this is wrong, we've got to change this, and set up Gotcha4Life, which initially was a men's charity, but it soon became apparent that it's not only men but women, youth and, regrettably, children who suffer from mental illness.

One of the objectives of the charity is to make sure people don't worry alone, because so many people take their own life and nobody had any idea, because they'd had nobody to talk to.

This particular program is a whole-of-community, whole-of-school approach. We work with parents, teachers and children on building their mental fitness. When we work with children there are three factors we focus on. The first is building their emotional muscles, so when kids have an issue, whether it's family breakup, bullying at school or poor performance, they tend to internalise it, and that's when depression can start. We teach them ways to externalise that and talk to people about it. The second protective factor is having your own village, people you can go and talk to, whether it's mum and dad, teachers, relatives or friends, someone you can talk to about what's going on for you, because we don't want people to worry alone.

We're now in 68 schools, up from 28 last year. My hope is we'll get to 90 by the end of the current club grants period. I went to a parent night our educators held, about 30 parents in the room, talking about their own mental fitness and their children's. It was quiet to start with, then after ten minutes the floodgates opened, and people spoke about their issues and how they could work with their children. When it finished, the woman sitting next to me, who I'd never met before, turned and said, I hate saying this, but I'm so happy I'm not the only one who felt like I did when I walked in. I thought it was me, I thought I was a lousy parent. I'm leaving here today with strategies to cope with my issues and my son's issues. This has been life changing for me. That's the sort of feedback we get across the board.

It's a unique, preventative program, focused on early intervention. We work with teachers so they can run the program when we're not there, but we're on site up to ten times a year, working with parents, teachers and students. In year 5 we run whole-of-school assemblies. Last year we had a showcase at Western Sydney Uni with 18 schools, where students presented back to parents, teachers and funders what they'd learned. I showed some people two club grant interviews last week and they cried both times, not from sadness but from the passion of what they saw in those programs. In the video, Gus says, and it's so true, this should be in every school in New South Wales, it should be in the curriculum.

In year 6 we also run a transition to high school program. In year 6 you have one teacher who knows your strengths and weaknesses. In year 7 you have different teachers for every subject, and you go from being the big fish in a little pond to getting a whack over the back of the head from a year 10, whether you need it or not. We teach the strategies to manage that transition. It's a three year program that builds mental fitness over time.

Unfortunately, 50 percent of mental health issues emerge before the age of 14, which is why this program is so critical. Regrettably, in Australia we lose nine people a day on average to suicide, that's 3,300 a year, two and a half times the national road toll. It's just terrible, and what we're trying to do is minimise that, and if we could eradicate it, even better. Interestingly and sadly, 66 percent of attempted suicides are women, even though the actual suicide rate skews toward men, roughly seven to two. There are so many others who attempt suicide that thankfully doesn't come to fruition. In a nutshell, that's the program, and it's been so well accepted by the community and by clubs.

Michelle Pascoe: Those statistics are shocking, for a young country like Australia, with so much joy, space and a good health system, these numbers are still so high, it's hard to understand why. What I loved hearing about your program is that it's not just the children, it's the parents too. Hearing that mother say, you do your best but you just don't always know what impact you're having, that resonates. I've got grandchildren now, and my grandson's just gone into high school, and it was really about which school his mates were going to, that friendship group mattered more to us than which school might be marginally better academically.

I went to a school with only ten kids in it, three of us in year 6, then went to boarding school, and that was an absolute shock, bullying and all, I still don't think I'm over it all these years later. So having that three year program, giving children and their parents those skills, because parents don't always see the signs, exactly as Gus said, nobody knew his friend was in that mental health space before he took his life.

It feels like an uphill battle, but at least with programs like Gotcha4Life we're trying to make an indent, and hopefully that grows. Is this just in New South Wales?

Don Tilley: We are starting in Queensland, we've just put our toe in the water there, so there are a few schools up there as well. By 2030 we're looking to be in 250 schools, working with around 160,000 parents, teachers and children.

Michelle Pascoe: Two things from what you said. Firstly, with my grandson going to the school where his mates are, he's got his village, exactly what we're talking about, having people you can go to who can protect you and who you can protect too.

You'll probably still get the odd cocky year 8 who thinks they know everything, that's just life too, but I think the difference for us was that when you went home, it stopped in the playground. Today it follows kids home, it's a different world.

I love this program. But what are clubs doing? When I see registered clubs, they have such a big impact across the community, sometimes as one of the major employers in an area, city or regional, and it's the tens of thousands of members who come through. From where you sit, what role do clubs play in mental fitness and community connection that most people, including club leaders themselves, aren't fully recognising?

Don Tilley: I think it's improving. If I go back to when I first started working with clubs on grants, you wouldn't talk about mental illness, it was seen as a weakness, especially for a guy, the last thing you'd want to say is I've got issues, I've got worries. That's changed a lot. If you look at the club grants scheme over the last couple of years, where councils put out funding priorities, the top two have been domestic violence and mental health. Clubs are really starting to embrace that, though some do it better than others.

I think one area we need help with is regional areas, who deal with flood, drought and disengagement, and often don't have access to the professional help they need if mental health issues do arise. Having a prevention program there is essential. For regional clubs, if you can help us get into schools in your area with funding, that would make a massive difference to your community.

To answer your question directly, I think clubs are doing a much better job than they were, but you don't need to be sick to get better. I think there's more we can all do together to get that message across, of what clubs do and how they can make a difference. I think programs like yours help clubs understand this, because sometimes people just don't know where to start, and having someone come to them means they don't have to start from scratch and think of something themselves. They can grab onto a program like Gotcha4Life, support it, and understand both what club grants are doing for the community and what the community is doing for the club in return. It's small steps, but I think we're starting to get a trot on now, we're starting to move, which is really good.

Michelle Pascoe: If a club CEO or general manager is listening to this podcast right now, what's the one thing you want them to walk away and consider doing differently when it comes to community connection and mental fitness?

Don Tilley: A couple of things. First, I'd suggest they look at their own staff. When you consider how many people are employed by clubs, and that one in two people have considered a mental health issue in recent months, there's going to be a lot of staff struggling on the inside that we don't know about. We run kickstarter programs where we go and work with clubs and their staff directly, so that's important. It's also important, from our point of view, to have the funding to go out and do this work in the community. We're in 68 schools, but when you think of the total number of schools in New South Wales, there's a huge opportunity to change, and in some cases save, children's, parents' and teachers' lives.

The other thing worth looking at is our mental fitness app. It's free, and I've suggested to a number of clubs that they look at it. If you've had a lousy day, an argument before work, a shocker at the office, you sit down with a coffee, open the app, and it gives you tips and strategies from professionals who can help lift you back up. I'd recommend every club look at it, and talk to their patrons about it too, because mental illness doesn't discriminate, a lot of patrons are in the same boat.

Michelle Pascoe: I'll put a link to the app on my website, and I think if clubs put it on theirs too, the community can access it easily, because people go to a club website to check the bistro specials or whether bingo's on, and it could just be the moment they notice the app and think, what's this? Clubs also have intranets for staff and payroll, so having it there for employees matters too. I was training the leadership team at the Epping Club recently, and Rachel Landers, the P&C executive director there, mentioned they've got my podcast on their staff portal, so when the team log in, it's right there for them to listen to. The easier we make it for people to find, the less likely they are to put it off.

I love that idea of having it on your phone, because we all sit down for that cup of tea or coffee and pick the thing up, instead of doom scrolling and making ourselves feel worse, we can look at the app instead. I'll certainly promote it as much as I can. Anything that helps our community within registered clubs matters, because we touch so many people across every generation, seven generations if you include the little alphas coming through now, and four generations working in the workplace. Hundreds of thousands of people that we meet and see each day within our beautiful club industry.

I'll put some links to Gotcha4Life in the show notes, but how can my listeners and viewers actually contact you? I know some of the industry already knows you, but after all these years some people will still go, what's Gotcha4Life?

Don Tilley: You can go to gotcha4life.org, and there's a whole lot of information there. You can contact me directly at [email protected], or you can even give me a call, people still use the telephone. I'd love to chat to anybody who wants to know more about the charity or wants to get involved. We're fortunate to have a lot of partners, and we're changing the lives of children, and as I said, saving some lives as well.

Michelle Pascoe: It is changing and saving the lives of children, but also their families and their community, and I think that's a big point. Before we wrap up, is there anything I haven't asked that you wanted to share about Gotcha4Life?

Don Tilley: No, you've been very generous with your time and given me the opportunity to talk about this amazing charity. I think people have probably heard enough from me by now. It's a preventative charity, and it's something so needed in the community, and the talented people who've put these programs together are just amazing.

Michelle Pascoe: It is, and let's get it out there, hopefully we'll have 90 schools before the end of this year.

Don Tilley: I'll let you know.

Michelle Pascoe: Thank you so much for joining me, Don.

Don Tilley: Thank you for having me, Michelle. I really appreciate it.

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